Tag: weekthatwas

  • The week that was

    The week that was

    As the Japanese Emperor rides off into the sunset and the country resets the Imperial Calendar, transition products are all the rage including one enterprising vendor who is selling cans of Heiwa-era air. A Santa Rosa man lost his prosthetic leg while skydiving over the Northern California vineyards. “I tried to watch where it was […]

  • The week that was

    The week that was

    An Easter Bunny broke up a brawl in Orlando. The Ukrainian comedian mentioned in the April 5th TWTW not only won the runoff election, he is now President. After getting more than 70% of the votes, Volodymyr Zelensky, the man who plays president on a popular tv show, has defeated the incumbent President. Researchers at […]

  • The week that was (04-19-19)

    The week that was (04-19-19)

    An Indiana man is suing his parents for getting rid of his vast pornography collection, which he estimates is worth $29,000. Game developer Ubisoft carefully documented Notre Dame in order to reproduce it for their video game, Assassin’s Creed. Ubisoft has not only handed over their files to the architects on the cathedral restoration project […]

  • The week that was (04-12-19)

    The week that was (04-12-19)

    Quirky stories from the week prior.

  • The week that was

    The week that was

    Monday was April Fool’s Day which is always busy day at SmartNews because even the most sophisticated artificial intelligence algorithms have a hard time detecting satire. Now, onto the news that was, unbelievably, real. Scientists published a paper that concluded that music by dubstep star Skrillex can keep mosquitoes from biting. “By coincidence, and rather […]

  • The week that was

    The week that was

    A truck spilled several bags of marijuana across a San Francisco area freeway (880 in Emeryville if you must know). CHP posted on twitter, “Roses are red, violets are blue, your spilled weed is green and we have a citation just for you!” A Florida man decided he wanted to get all his neighbors high […]

  • The week that was

    The week that was

    Jelly Belly, the California-based jelly bean company that was a favorite treat of Ronald “just say no” Reagan, debuted a cannabis-infused jelly bean. The national pharmacy chain CVS announced that it began selling CDB products in 8 states. Worlds collided over at Porsche where they announced they will be releasing an all-electric 911 car bringing […]

  • The week that was (Ides of March)

    The week that was (Ides of March)

    Fed chairman Jerome Powell used a piece of fine art to illustrate how too much focus on the details can sometimes obscure the bigger picture. “We have artificially created a state that evolves in a direction opposite to that of the thermodynamic arrow of time,” said Gordey Lesovik, a quantum physicist from the Moscow Institute […]

  • The week that was

    The week that was

    The wonder of shrimp cocktails, surviving on Taco Bell Fire Sauce, and a $380k flying jet motorcycle.

  • The week that was

    The week that was

    Scientists are trying to figure out how an 8-foot humpback whale ended up in the Amazon jungle. Harvard University wearily denied published rumors that Rapper Lil Pump was replacing German Chancellor Angela Merkel as this year’s commencement speaker. A brewer decided the world needed a Lucky Charms-flavored beer. Morning Marshmallow IPA goes on sale on […]