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TWTW

The week that was

Danni Morritt asked her Amazon Echo to teach her about the cardiac cycle of the heart. To her horror, someone had edited the wikipedia page that the Echo uses for source material so the Echo told Danni not only that heartbeats are “bad for the planet” but that she should, “stab herself for the common good.

Police in Colorado Springs arrested a bank robber who robbed a downtown bank, then stepped out and tossed the cash in the air while saying “Merry Christmas”

The US Patent Office awarded Nike a patent for blockchain-verified sneaker line they are calling CryptoKicks.

Scientists have figured out how to edit tomato genes to make them grow into bouquets, like flowers.

A New York state assemblyman wrote an editorial to the local paper on Christmas Eve about the dangers of drunk driving. On New Year’s Eve he drove his GMC Acadia into a ditch and police determined he was drunk driving.

Headlines with the words Iran and attack triggered high frequency trading algorithms to rapidly sell off dollar/yen before traders grabbed the wheel and brought it back.

A Florida beachcomber brought home what she though was an old rusty plate but later discovered it was a landmine.

A Spanish television reporter won the lottery and quit her job, live on air. “Natalia doesn’t work tomorrow. Woo!” she declared while wagging her finger. Natalia later found out her payout was only $5,500 after discovering she was sharing her earnings with hundreds of others, “It’s unclear if [she] is still an employee at RTVE”

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